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National Embalming School

(O, Tannenbaum)

We live for you, we die for you, National Embalming School
We do our best to give you rest, National Embalming School
And when you die, we'll dig a hole, and bury you so deep and cold
We live for you, we die for you, National Embalming School
Post mortem, post mortem, post mortem, autopsy we must have
Post mortem, post mortem, post mortem, autopsy we must have
Cut! Slash! Gash! Bleed! We must know the reason
Glory how the body stinks! It must be out of season
We live for you, we die for you, National Embalming School


Nature Trail to Hell (In 3-D)

Coming this Christmas to a theater near you
The most horrifying film to hit the screen!
There's a homicidal maniac who finds a Cub scout troop!
And he hacks up two or three in every scene
Please don't reveal the secret ending to your friends
Don't spoil the the big surprise. You won't believe your eyes
When you see Nature Trail to Hell
Nature Trail to Hell, Nature Trail to Hell In 3-D
Nature Trail to Hell, Nature Trail to Hell
Nature Trail to Hell In 3-D
See severed heads that almost fall right in your lap
See that bloody hatchet coming right at you
No, you'll never see hideous effects like these again
Till we bring you Nature Trail to Hell, Part II
So bring the kids along, it's good clean family fun
What have you got to lose? If you like the Six O'clock News
Then you'll like Nature Trail to Hell
Nature Trail to Hell, Nature Trail to Hell In 3-D
Nature Trail to Hell, Nature Trail to Hell
Nature Trail to Hell In 3-D


Nellie Gray

There's a low green valley on the old Kentucky shore
There I've whiled many happy hours away
A-sitting and a-singing by the little cottage door
Where lived my darling Nellie Gray
Oh my poor Nellie Gray
They have taken you away
And I'll never see my darling any more
I'm sitting by the river
And I'm weeping all the day
For you've gone from the old Kentucky shore


Nkosi Sikelel' Iafrika

Nkosi Sikelel' iAfrika
Maluphakanyisw' uphando lwayo
Yiva imithandazo yethu
Nkosi sikelele
Thina lusapho lwayo
Yiza Moya, Yiza, Yiza
Yiza Moya, Yiza, Yiza
Yiza Moya oyingcwele
Nkosi sikelele
Thina lusapho lwayo
Morena boloka sechaba sa heso
O fedise dintwa le matswenyeho
Morena boloka sechaba sa heso
O fedise dintwa le matswenyeho
O se boloke, O se boloke
O se boloke, O se boloke
Sechaba sa Heso
Sechaba sa Afrika


No Bananas In The Sky

(Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes)

There are no bananas in the sky, In the sky
There are no bananas in the sky, In the sky
There's a sun and moon, And coconut cream pie
But there are no bananas in the sky, In the sky

No - Action of sweeping hands from crossed position across the chest outwards and away form the body
Bannanas - Action of peeling a bannana
Sky - Action of pointing upwards towards the sky
Sun - Action of putting hands against side of head palms facing forwards to make the shape of the sun
Moon - Action of putting hands to one side of head to make a pillow for the head to rest on as if asleep
Coconut cream pie - Action of feeding a hand sized pie into mouth


No Boots At All

Way down in the land of the Antipodes
Where the lights of the camp-fires shine bright on the trees
Bushmen will tell you as night shadows fall
There's a ghost roams the ranges with no boots at all

No boots, no boots at all
Roaming the ranges with no boots at all!

Way down in the city so sinful and bad
There lived a young fellow, a promising lad
He wanted to be a big bold mountaineer
But his mother replied as she tossed down her beer

Our hero, he murmured "Regardless press on"
When she woke in the morning, she found he was gone
And off to the hills went her agonised shout
"You've got no boots at all if you want to bail out!"

He found a big mountain and climbed to the top
And stood on the edge of that horrible drop
He thought of his mother all over again
He could still hear her shouting that mournful refrain

The god of the mountain looked down from his throne
And saw the young climber astanding alone
He said to his angel "Go down with a swoosh
And give that young fellow a helluva push"

The Angel of Destiny swept through the pass
And planted a foot fair and square on his pants
As over and over and over fell he
The angels were singing this sweet melody

St Peter, he stood at the heavenly gate
Checking in drunks coming early and late
The Orderly Angel just dropped in to say
"There's a dirty big climber a-coming this way"

St Peter came down with a bucket of beer
Saying, "Sorry, young fellow, you can't come in here
With thousands of angels to answer your call
You'd be no good in heaven with no boots at all"

The night it was stormy, the hour it was late
When our hero arrived at the Satanic Gate
The little black devils, they spat in his face
To show you, they said, it's a helluva place!

The devil said "Sorry, I can't let you in
Unless you've been leading a lifetime of sin
But how could you wallow, and how could you fall?
You can't be a sinner with no boots at all!"

Now all you young fellows who some day may roam
Be careful to stay with your mother at home
With no one to love him or answer his call
His ghost roams the ranges with no boots at all

It's Sunday night and it's half past nine
We're leavin' one more town behind
The mirrors are showing the day's last glow
As we spin out into the jigsaw flow of life

Up ahead where there should be the thickness of night
Stars are pinned on a shimmering curtain of light
The sky's full of rippling cliffs and chasms
That shine like a sign on the road to heaven

I've been cut by the beauty of jagged mountains
And cut by the love that flows like a fountain from God
So I carry these scars precious and rare
And tonight I feel like I'm made of air


Now the Day is Over

Now the day is over, night is drawing nigh
Shadows of the evening steal across the sky
Now the darkness gathers, stars begin to peep
Birds and beasts and flowers soon will be asleep
Grant to all the weary, calm and sweet repose
With the kindest blessing, may our eyelids close
Grant to those who suffer rest and balm in thee
Guard the sailors tossing on the deep blue sea
When the morning wakens, then may I arise
Pure and fresh and hopeful, sunrise in my eyes


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